> Laney: Investigate rumbling

Previously on GoldStruck!

This is a collaboration with Dither.

> Laney: Investigate rumbling.

Whatever is going on, it doesn’t have anything to do with your SISTER’S strange methods of house-cleaning. The noise is clearly coming from outside. She is still making noise inside, but you are very attuned to the rumblings of THINGS.

You change your Chattervine status to ‘preserves’ and then walk over to look out a window. It’s unlikely that you’ll see anything. The STUDY is poorly situated, and only has windows to let in what little light can get through the trees.

When you tell your friends that you live in the middle of an ORCHARD, you usually don’t tell them that the description is fairly literal.

> Look out window.

You see the foliage and fruit of an apple tree.

> Go outside.

To do that, you’d have to pass through the living room, where your SISTER is still cleaning.

Just because she has never asked you to help clean house before is no reason to expect your SISTER to pass up such an opportunity now. There must be another way to see what’s happening outside.

> Open window and climb out.

Easier said than done. The tree’s branches scratch against the window as you lift the pane up from the ledge, resisting your efforts.

With much grunting and straining, you manage to get the window open and keep it that way. But your view is not much improved, nor are you likely to stick anything bigger than your hand out the window.


With a whipping sound that startles you into a foetal position on the ground, a tree branch snaps through the open window. It juts into the room like a gnarled poke in the eye.

Having rearranged itself thus, the tree apears to have made enough room for you to climb out onto its branches.

> Climb tree.

Unfortunately, it’s immediately clear that the only way you can climb is up. The branches grow too close together, and although it isn’t a long way to the ground, you don’t want to break your neck on the branches.

So you climb up, glad that the STUDY is almost directly beneath your room. Climbing to the top of the tree actually puts you in easy reach of one of the holes in your wall.

> Enter bedroom through hole in wall.

You punch through the back of the poster covering the hole. Your blow takes out the face of the female protagonist from ABSOLUTELY LAST ADVENTURE XVII. Although you have no way of seeing this, you peek through the hole and momentarily have giant two-dimensional BREASTS.

Then you tear through the rest of the poster.

> Using bedroom vantage point, assess siuation outside.

You are about to do that when you notice something weird about your bedroom.

Everything has been moved. The pile of ART SUPPLIES has been organised around your EASEL, and your RECORDS are neatly stacked beside the RECORD PLAYER. A closer look reveals that they have been alphabetised.

All of your ELEPHANTS have even been set up according to SIZE and a sliding scale of REALISM and CARTOON FAKERY. Yet your bed is unmade.

> Marvel at SISTER’S house-cleaning skills.

There is no way your SISTER did this. She would have made the bed. She would have made the bed first.

This seems worth reporting to your friend. Perhaps he will have a hypothesis. Even though he has never believed you about the ELDRITCH TERRORS. He’s a smart guy.

> Climb back down tree to use COMPUTER.

Why? You have a COMPUTER right here in your bedroom.

Granted, there is a KNIFE sticking out of the monitor, but it still works. You just can’t see everything on the screen.

One thought on “> Laney: Investigate rumbling

  1. Pingback: Rumors of War - GoldStruck: It’s Time You Two Talked

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