I’m well and truly throwing this out. I wrote it yesterday, about five minutes before we got to the hot springs. While we were there, Dither and I talked a lot about what I planned for the story, so I had a better idea of what I wanted to write and who all of the major characters will be. On the ride back, I took a second look and decided that the story needed to start from a different character’s point of view. This was relegated to chapter two.
But then I gave it another look and decided that it’s out of character, kind of bad, and that this story is not the one that I will finally put Rue in. She will find her place someday.
“I just think it’s a little far to go for chocolate.”
“It’s not just chocolate.” Summer sunlight baked the brick wall around Rue’s silhouette. She squinted at it, imagining singe marks appearing in the pocked mortar.
David crouched on the edge of the sidewalk. It was too hot to sit on the pavement. “It takes more than putting the word ‘gourmet’ in front of something to make it worth a four-hour drive.”
Her braid had come loose again. She tried to tuck the loose hairs back in, but it was like trying to repair a cake after little fingers had assaulted the iced flowers.
I do like that last line, still. I may use that one, at least.